Simple Friend vs Real Friend

A simple friend identifies himself when he calls. A real friend doesn't have to. A simple friend opens a conversation with a full news bulletin on his life. A real friend says, "What's new with you?" A simple friend thinks the problems u whine about are recent. A real friend says, "You've been whining about the same thing for 14yr.do smthng abt it.A simple friend hates it when u call after he has gone to bed. A real friend asks u why you took so long to call. A simple friend seeks to talk with u about your problems. A real friend seeks to help u with your problems. A simple friend wonders about your romantic history. A real friend could blackmail you with it. A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest. A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself. A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when u have an argument. A real friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight. A simple friend expects u 2 always be there for them. A real friend expects 2 always b there 4you!